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4:02am September 20, 2014

batteredoptimist:

ask-bernice-summerfield:

"I wanted it to not be real. You could go back before he dies, fix it."  She knew what she was asking of him. She also  understood why he couldn’t. if she had been in her right frame of mind she’d  never of asked him to.

"… I’m sorry, Bernice.” Fair features slowly turned sad, “You know why I cannot do that.” He looked as though he wanted to reach out to her then. Fingers twitched slightly and he so badly desired to comfort her. They remained where they were, however, and he kept to himself, “If I could fix it, I absolutely would.”

Benny took a deep breath. “You are supposed to fix things You are- “  Her words cut off as she choked back a sob.  She did know but it didn’t make it any better.

It was Irving the one who manipulated and schemed and acted like he was king of the universe and he would change things over and over again.. But the Doctor was different  And Bernice well she understood about  all that. It hadn’t been  the way they did stuff but she half wished it was.

12:48pm September 18, 2014

batteredoptimist:

ask-bernice-summerfield:

!”Her eyes opened.  “W what?” it took her a few moments to recall where she was.  “What , Jason isn’t dead?” she knew it was mostly sarcasm. Sometimes she had wished  it was just a nightmare and she could just wake up from it.

Large blue eyes blinked at her in concern and worry, “What?” Her sarcastic reaction obviously hadn’t been expected. Slowly, the Doctor pulled away from her, eyeing her carefully, “I just wanted to make sure you didn’t fall out of your chair. You were thrashing.”

"I wanted it to not be real. You could go back before he dies, fix it."  She knew what she was asking of him. She also  understood why he couldn’t. if she had been in her right frame of mind she’d  never of asked him to.

1:24am September 13, 2014

batteredoptimist:

ask-bernice-summerfield:

Benny had slept for some time before she started to stir,  she begun to mumble in her sleep as she seemed to get distressed as she mumbled Jason’s name in her sleep, her whole body trembled  and shook as she thrashed about on the chair.

When she nearly flailed herself out of her chair, the Doctor jumped to his feet and rushed over. It took him a few moments to realize the cause of her upset, but then he set into action quickly. Firmly, he laid his hands to her shoulders and gave them an insistent shake, “Benny-! Bernice! It’s just a dream…! Wake up

”Her eyes opened.  “W what?” it took her a few moments to recall where she was.  “What , Jason isn’t dead?” she knew it was mostly sarcasm. Sometimes she had wished  it was just a nightmare and she could just wake up from it.

10:23pm September 12, 2014

batteredoptimist:

ask-bernice-summerfield:

Benny  still felt pretty much in shock over recent events, so much she couldn’t really put any of it into words. It was too much, it hurt more than anything and there was a gut feeling at the back of her mind that this was somewhat her fault .

It was almost like she had just closed herself off and wasn’t aware of him  been there or simply hadn’t really heard his question. . “Jason, he -” it was as far as she got before tears rolled down her cheeks once more, before she slumped into her chair,  her eyes closing as she did, unable to fight  the sleep she clearly desperately needed.

The Doctor made an aborted noise of surprise as she passed out. Still, it might have been for the best. Getting quietly to his feet, he checked her pulse and laid a soft hand down upon her forehead briefly before becoming satisfied for now with her condition. Sleep would do her good.

Turning, he grabbed an afghan off of the back of his own chair and laid it across her. Best not move her now in case she woke up. Then he moved to pick up a book before dropping back down with a sigh to wait her out.

Benny had slept for some time before she started to stir,  she begun to mumble in her sleep as she seemed to get distressed as she mumbled Jason’s name in her sleep, her whole body trembled  and shook as she thrashed about on the chair.

5:57am September 10, 2014

batteredoptimist:

ask-bernice-summerfield:

She would of continued to say she was okay but he was right and he knew her didn’t he? She cant remember how long she’d known him but it was quite a long time she thought.

She glanced down at her lap,  sighing softly before glancing up at the Doctor. He was right about that too. She  did need rest. She had been avoiding sleep for some time avoiding the nightmares and the guilt of Jason’s death. She wasn’t sure what was worse staying awake or sleeping the days away.

“I don’t need to, ” she insisted as her eyes felt heavy as she tried keep herself awake. “I don’t want the nightmares.”

The Doctor sat perched on the edge of his chair. Long fingers were set upon his knees and it was clear he was resisting the urge to fidget. Especially with recent news coming to Benny, it was becoming difficult not to leap to his feet and pace. However, that wouldn’t help her own ability to calm down.

"Is there something I can do to help you?” He questioned as sensitively as he could muster. There was still some anger simmering down beneath. “I could sit with you, if you like, and wake you if one starts coming on.”

Benny  still felt pretty much in shock over recent events, so much she couldn’t really put any of it into words. It was too much, it hurt more than anything and there was a gut feeling at the back of her mind that this was somewhat her fault .

It was almost like she had just closed herself off and wasn’t aware of him  been there or simply hadn’t really heard his question. . “Jason, he -” it was as far as she got before tears rolled down her cheeks once more, before she slumped into her chair,  her eyes closing as she did, unable to fight  the sleep she clearly desperately needed.

7:39am September 9, 2014

batteredoptimist:

batteredoptimist:

She took the water taking a sip of it. She hadn’t realized how thirsty she had been. and within moments she had  drank the entire glass of water.   She merely picked at the biscuits  like a fussy child  Before pushing the plate away.  She couldn’t eat,  she had lost her appetite for food  some time ago.

“I’m okay, ” she lied. She knew she wasn’t. She was so far from being okay.

He made no comment as she pushed the biscuits aside. Instead, the Doctor settled across from her in another one of the large chairs and cast her a quiet look, “You don’t look it, my dear. In fact, I think your tears from earlier have done a good job of discounting any possibility of you being alright.”

Lips twitched upward in a humorless smile, “I know you’re upset and I’ll do the best I can to help. It would be good for me, I think, to hear all of what happened. However, I won’t ask you to do that now. For now, you need rest in all of it’s forms.”

She would of continued to say she was okay but he was right and he knew her didn’t he? She cant remember how long she’d known him but it was quite a long time she thought.

She glanced down at her lap,  sighing softly before glancing up at the Doctor. He was right about that too. She  did need rest. She had been avoiding sleep for some time avoiding the nightmares and the guilt of Jason’s death. She wasn’t sure what was worse staying awake or sleeping the days away.

“I don’t need to, ” she insisted as her eyes felt heavy as she tried keep herself awake. “I don’t want the nightmares.”

1:34am September 3, 2014

batteredoptimist:

batteredoptimist:

She leaned against him, allowing him  to guide her towards his ship as she stumbled a little as she walked.  The last time she had properly been there was before her wedding  although there was  that little adventure they had sometime  later. Her memories were a little mixed up. She felt confused  that much was clear to her.

Once they made it into the TARDIS, the Doctor guided her towards one of the large leather chairs in the main room. After helping her sit, he patted the back of her hand, “Wait there just a moment.” Then he disappeared down the hallway. Several moments later, he re-appeared with a glass of water and a plate of biscuits. Just in case.

She took the water taking a sip of it. She hadn’t realized how thirsty she had been. and within moments she had  drank the entire glass of water.   She merely picked at the biscuits  like a fussy child  Before pushing the plate away.  She couldn’t eat,  she had lost her appetite for food  some time ago.

“I’m okay, ” she lied. She knew she wasn’t. She was so far from being okay.

8:25pm September 2, 2014

batteredoptimist:

batteredoptimist:

Benny nods.  She feels too overwhelmed by everything. Too much in shock to deal with too much even, even though  it was weeks ago that it all happened although it feels much longer.  “Irving.. He told me he’d make it all better. ” She bit her lip not really sure how he could.

She felt herself  shivering and shaking slightly. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept or eaten for that matter.

Gently, the Doctor tugged at her, “Come along, now. Let’s get you inside and sitting down. You’re going to shake yourself apart like that.”

Carefully, he began to usher her towards the TARDIS. The fast he could get her in, the sooner he could get some actual food and water into her and help ease her out of her shock. 

She leaned against him, allowing him  to guide her towards his ship as she stumbled a little as she walked.  The last time she had properly been there was before her wedding  although there was  that little adventure they had sometime  later. Her memories were a little mixed up. She felt confused  that much was clear to her.

6:46am September 2, 2014

batteredoptimist:

ask-bernice-summerfield:

"Got anything stronger?" she asks. It’s probably clear she is in a rather bad place and the ability to think clearly isn’t there, more so than normally.  And well it’s no secret that she likes to drink.

"Unfortunately, no, I don’t.” In fact, he probably could have dredged up some dusty old bottle from somewhere in the TARDIS. However, he didn’t seem remotely inclined to do so and reached for her hand, patting the back. “At the very least, come and sit down.” Soft voice dripped with worry at this point - all hints of past rage hidden.  

Benny nods.  She feels too overwhelmed by everything. Too much in shock to deal with too much even, even though  it was weeks ago that it all happened although it feels much longer.  “Irving.. He told me he’d make it all better. ” She bit her lip not really sure how he could.

She felt herself  shivering and shaking slightly. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept or eaten for that matter.

5:17am September 2, 2014

batteredoptimist:

ask-bernice-summerfield:

 She wiped her eyes on the back of her hand.   “Sorry I ruined your shirt,” she whispered realising it was wet with her tears as she glanced up at him.  Her heart already felt it was broken into a million pieces. She didn’t know what was worse, losing Jason or her last words to him be in anger towards him.

She wanted to get away but she didn’t want him to feel he had to take her with him  more as an obligation.   Of course it was more than his brother murdering Jason. But she couldn’t find the words.  Had someone asked her if she thought Irving  was capable  of such acts she’d laughed them off the collection. Now she felt a mixture of  confusion, shock  and disbelief.

The Doctor carefully smiled and lifted a hand to brush away some of the tears still tracing her cheek. Beneath the surface of his expression, a quiet sort of rage seemed to be building, but that wasn’t for her. “It’s of no matter.” A brief silence followed before he posed his next question softly, “Benny - would you like to come aboard the TARDIS and have a cup of tea?”

"Got anything stronger?" she asks. It’s probably clear she is in a rather bad place and the ability to think clearly isn’t there, more so than normally.  And well it’s no secret that she likes to drink.